
On Saturday we joined friends, Adam, Christine, Todd, Kelly, Brian, Sara, Mike, and Adam, at the Bristol Renaissance Faire just over the Wisconsin/Illinois border in Bristol, Wisconsin. I’d never been to the faire before and was interested to see what it was like.
Adam, Todd and Brian have a lake house nearby Bristol and they’ve gone to the faire the past few years. Since their house is so close, we made plans to stay there overnight. Also, because we’re old responsible people now, we hired a van to take us to the faire and then to some bars and then back home. There aren’t really cabs up there, so that was the only option for not drinking and driving.

Ok. First things first. I had no idea what to expect of this faire and what I really did not expect were permanent, solid structures. They must use these buildings for 3 months (the faire runs July – September) of the year and then they must just sit for the 3 other seasons of the year. Also, you don’t have to wear costumes to attend, but the people working there all have on very elaborate period costumes. They also all act in character. Some work at stands, some are in shows, some are just wandering around. I’m really interested to know what these people do on the off season!

Adam Crack
One of the first things we saw when we came in the door was a guy doing a show with a whip. His name was Adam Crack. This guy holds 7 Guinness World Records for things like longest whip ever cracked, most whip cracks in a minute, most candles extinguished in a minute with a whip and most drink cans broken with a whip in three minutes. Pretty impressive, but we moved on quickly. It was past noon and we needed food and drink pronto!

Clockwise: Brian, Adam, Adam & Todd, Mike
I’d been hearing the guys talking about the turkey legs you get at the Renaissance Faire. They were pretty much exactly what I imagined. I don’t know why guys like these things so much! I didn’t even take one bite.

Artichokes, Spanish Fries, Kabob-wich
Here are a few things I did bite, though. Artichoke hearts freshly steamed and served with butter. In the middle are Spanish fries. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this. These were like potato wedges with grilled onions and nacho cheese sauce. Still good, though. Kelly and I split one of these kabob-wiches: garlic and lemon buttered skewers with fresh veggies on a bun. We also split a sausage with onions and sauerkraut. Oh, and Dallas and I tried a free sample of cheese fritters and they were so light and puffy and delicious.

Adam + Big Pickle
Adam seemed to really enjoy this very large pickle!

And….. it was Wisconsin, afterall. Brats!

Adam & Mike
Sword and shield shop. Boys will be boys!

Black Widow
This lady did not talk or attempt contact at all. She just quietly made her spiderwebs. It was eery!

Adam
Adam got suckered into trying this game. The ladder is secured at the top with a rope on a tree and on the bottom to the ground. For $2 you get three tries to climb it. If you make it to the top they give you $10. That should have been the first indication of how hard it is!

Adam
Here’s what happened to him every time. That guy had straw on him all day. Just to prove it can be done, the faire worker climbed up the ladder after Adam failed several times.

I visited this area many times during the day!

We arrived at this area right in time for the jousting match. Some knight called Maximilian won. Later on Dallas somehow recognized him in the parade and shouted out to him.

Dallas
Dallas got caught up in this Vegetable Justice game. As he was walking buy some guy told him that he could get a free toss because he was wearing a hat. Of course, he ended up buying more tosses. (He took the hat off while throwing.)

The thing with this game is that you have to throw tomatoes. And you know how much Dallas hates tomatoes! The tomatoes are cut in a way that makes them hard to throw. Also, the guy you’re trying to hit is launching insults at you the whole time, so it’s hard to concentrate. They even had a sign that said “This is an insult game! Do not play if you are easily offended!” I can’t remember what they said about Dallas. Something about Charlie Sheen is so far undercover that he’s disguising himself as Asian. Something like that. Look at how hard the couple behind Dallas are laughing. It must have been something funny!

Adam
Next up: Archery. Beer and arrows: What could go wrong!?

Adam
I don’t think I’ve shot an arrow since archery in junior high. Sara said she had to take it in junior high too. I still have bruises on my arm from where the bow string snapped me back.

Even better than archery: Knife throwing! Beer and knives: What could go wrong!?

Dallas
Actually, there were quite a few areas that you could throw different kind of knives and axes. I think the guys hit them all up.

Elaborately dressed and rich with our money faire worker!

Todd

Brian
Next up was the strong man competition. I think we bought about 15 swings and everyone got at least one turn.

Rachelle
Every guy hit the bell, some on the first try, some after a few tries. Every girl only made it to the plague flea level!
Stay tuned for part 2 of our Bristol Renaissance Faire day!
































